Tis the season of sparkle and giving, music and mayhem celebration, giving and cheer.
And the annual Christmas wish list.
If I could have world peace, solid polar ice caps, and an end to world hunger and pestilence, I’d ask for that. Santa tends to bring things a little more modest, though, so what are we hankering for over here this year?
10. Wall canvases.
When one has 18 trillion photos in the camera roll, can one really have too many canvases on the wall? Last year dear Sammy gave me a gift certificate with which I finally beautified my mantel with a giant hydrangea print. I have dreamy beach prints downstairs, but a girl can always use a little more.
9. Personalized greeting cards.
Again with the trillion photos…Social Print Studio will make you a set of blank-inside cards using whatever photos you give them. (Incidentally, they make a really cool daily tear-away calendar using your 365 most favorite pics.)
8. Orchids.
What could be prettier on the side of a sunny bathtub than a bright, tropical orchid? I haven’t forgotten the breath-taking Orchid Room at the U.S. Botanic Gardens. But just one little one by my bath would do.
7. Fleece leggings.
I am always cold. Always. Always. I literally shiver through the Sunday sermon while the pastor fans himself and wipes away sweat. I recently used birthday money to get a Thermajane fleece top, which is awesome. I call it my sealskin, as it is so sleek on the outside, fuzzy on the inside, and so tight and warm. But I’ve heard of fleece leggings, although I do not own some; that sounds like something I could get along with.
6. A real garden out back.
Ok, Santa, I realize this might be as unrealistic as peace in the Middle East. I have never yet become a successful gardener, unless you count the raised-bed-turned-mud-pit that so successfully attracted neighborhood children at our old house. The tomatoes actually got a decent start that year, but then the 5-inch yellow garden spiders took over, the killdeer laid eggs in the garden and got territorial, and it went downhill from there.
I’ve tried and failed at strawberries, asparagus, tomatoes, parsnips, cantaloupe, peas, corn, fruit trees, blueberries, and all kinds of herbs. I’ve even killed mint multiple times, which is supposed to be an invasive species.
I HAVE grown lettuce successfully! And I committed so far as to start not one but two compost bins. So let’s build on that success, Santa. Let’s see if you believe in me.
Don’t we all need a hobby where the goal is the journey, not the destination?
5. Socks.
“What do you see when you look in the mirror?”
“I? I see myself holding a pair of thick, woolen socks.” Harry stared.
“One can never have enough socks,” said Dumbledore. “Another Christmas has come and gone and I didn’t get a single pair.”
If you were looking for proof of my middle age, search no more.
4. Wall calendar for my school room.
Last year Jeddy got me a personalized one with first-day-of-school pictures on every month, ranging all the way back to when I had fewer than four kids. The aaaawwwwww! factor is very high.
3. A countertop herb grower.
I put the AeroGarden Harvest on my list, because can 9,560 people really be wrong? The manufacturer claims there is “no sun, soil or green thumb required” which sounds like a description of my qualifications. When one potential buyer asked, “Do these actually grow herbs or do they just kinda die slower?” nine reviewers assured them that they actually do grow herbs. I know, I know, past history failure rate and all that…. See: journey vs. destination, #6 above.
2. A full-body wetsuit.
Did I mention I’m always cold? I meant in air, water, or any other substance known to man. And, because we are optimistic to the point of questionable rationality…we are planning a cruise. With our children. And certain foolhardy brave extended family members. And tropical destination or not, I will be cold. And because being cold significantly dents my enjoyment of things, and because I have no personal pride, I’m hoping to bring a wetsuit. And I can’t wait to lie around in the sun at the town pool next summer sporting my full-body wetsuit in front of my kids who will undoubtedly roll their eyes until they stick that way. [See: middle age, #5 above.]
1. Swim shirts.
Years ago I needed new swimwear. As all womankind knows that swimsuit shopping is the quickest, surest way to deepest darkest depression, I ordered bunches of swimsuits from Amazon to cry try them on in the comfort of my home and return the no-go’s at my leisure. To my surprise, many of them fit, but as I say, this was years ago, and I’ve worn through almost all of them except a couple that I bought specifically and exclusively for a very romantic couples-only anniversary trip—ie not ideal for family-friendly cruising. Rather than face the demons of swimsuit shopping again, I’m hoping to find a swim shirt or two under the tree that I can throw on for security and modesty, thus putting off that dire task at least til next summer.
What’s on your Santa list?
