Of goddesses and mortals

My wonderful sweet sister-in-law gave me a day at the spa for Christmas, so I spent Saturday afternoon getting a facial and massage.  I was the only one in the shop, there were beautiful beachy paintings on the walls, island flute music playing... I laid on a warm bed with heated blankets and towels and rocks on me... and all the while the lady smeared lovely-smelling goop over me.  When I use nice cosmetics myself, I'm stingy about it, but she was glopping it right on.


It was so great.


I laid there, half asleep, wallowing in luxury and indulgence while she worked, and I felt just like the Royal Kumari--the girl selected in Kathmandu to be worshipped as the incarnation of the goddess Taleju.


Except that I'm not a little girl.


Nor have I been removed from my family to live alone in a palace.


Nor do I get carried through the streets.


Nor do crowds worship me.


So, not much like the Royal Kumari at all.


Many times the chosen girl is as young as three years old.  So, on the off chance that we become Hindus and move to Nepal, could Lizzy be selected for such an honor?  Supposedly, there are quite a few criteria, including:

-  A set of twenty teeth... check!

-  Dainty feet.... sure!

-  Eyelashes like a cow... check!

-  A neck like a conch shell... um...

-  Voice soft and clear as a duck's.  This isn't quite how I would describe Lizzy's voice.  Especially the "soft" part.  And maybe the "duck" part.

-  Serenity.  Ok, it's hopeless.  We'll stay in America and get her a day at the spa.


I don't know if they do criminal background checks on potential Kumaris, but Lizzy's rap sheet might also disqualify her.

This is Ada's running list of nighttime offenses.  The listings indicate the number of items Lizzy stole while Ada slept, often from right off Ada's top bunk.


We're working on a solution to this problem, but in the meantime, Ada sleeps with a sword at her side.  If she catches Lizzy climbing up the bed, she uses it to chase her off.


This forces Lizzy to be more stealthy.  The other morning she announced proudly to me, "I put away everything I stole!"  Hooray for stage one morality!

Thanks for the spa day, Jo!  We all like to be a goddess for a little while.